Image by Annie in Beziers via Flickr
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when i was a girl
my daddy left
step-daddy gone, too
i ended up alone
no man to look up to
no protector …..no love…..
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my heart’s full of dead flowers and dead memories
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when i was a teenager
i never wanted to be alone
went from boy to boy
it never lasted long
’cause no one
protected me
’cause no one
ever loved me enough
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my heart’s full of dead flowers and dead memories
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when i became a woman
it was always the same
i couldn’t stand to be alone
and no man ever loved me enough
my whole life
no man ever loved me enough
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a heart full of dead flowers and dead memories
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“Kiss From A Rose” Seal
showsdoseculo
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this is my submission to ~
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I’m in a bit of a jam… at POETRY JAM
the prompt is to write about flowers, BUT write something dark.
thanks for a great prompt, Poetikat.
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One Shoot Sunday at One Stop Poetry. go check out some of the other entries or submit one yourself. take some time to look around the site if you’ve never been there ~ it is FABulous! Happy first Anniversary One Stop Poetry!
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The Poetry Pantry #56 at Poets United a FABulous site for poets
submit a new or old poem
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Poetry Potluck Week 42 at Jingle Poetry a Fabulous site for poets. spend some time there!
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The Bop is a poetic form that was developed by poet Afaa Michael Weaver at a Cave Canem summer retreat.
Here are the basic rules:
- 3 stanzas
- Each stanza is followed by a refrain
- First stanza is 6 lines long and presents a problem
- Second stanza is 8 lines long and explores or expands the problem
- Third stanza is 6 lines long and either presents a solution or documents the
failed attempt to resolve the problem
(eight lines long) explores or expands upon the problem. If there is a
resolution to the problem, the third stanza (six lines long) finds it. If a
substantive resolution cannot be made, then this final stanza documents the
attempt and failure to succeed…..Read More
via Poetic Asides
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i’m also participating in ~
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lyrics ~
There used to be a graying tower alone on the sea.
You became the light on the dark side of me.
Love remained a drug that’s the high and not the pill.
But did you know,
That when it snows,
My eyes become large and
The light that you shine can be seen.
Baby,
I compare you to a kiss from a rose on the gray.
Ooh,
The more I get of you,
The stranger it feels, yeah.
And now that your rose is in bloom.
A light hits the gloom on the gray.
There is so much a man can tell you,
So much he can say.
You remain,
My power, my pleasure, my pain, baby
To me you’re like a growing addiction that I can’t deny.
Won’t you tell me is that healthy, baby?
But did you know,
That when it snows,
My eyes become large and the light that you shine can be seen.
Baby,
I compare you to a kiss from a rose on the gray.
Ooh, the more I get of you
The stranger it feels, yeah
Now that your rose is in bloom.
A light hits the gloom on the gray,
I’ve been kissed by a rose on the gray,
I’ve been kissed by a rose
I’ve been kissed by a rose on the gray,
…And if I should fall along the way
I’ve been kissed by a rose
…been kissed by a rose on the gray.
There is so much a man can tell you,
So much he can say.
You remain
My power, my pleasure, my pain.
To me you’re like a growing addiction that I can’t deny, yeah
Won’t you tell me is that healthy, baby.
But did you know,
That when it snows,
My eyes become large and the light that you shine can be seen.
Baby,
I compare you to a kiss from a rose on the gray.
Ooh, the more I get of you
The stranger it feels, yeah
Now that your rose is in bloom,
A light hits the gloom on the gray.
Yes I compare you to a kiss from a rose on the gray
Ooh, the more I get of you
The stranger it feels, yeah
And now that your rose is in bloom
A light hits the gloom on the gray
Now that your rose is in bloom,
A light hits the gloom on the gray.
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my heart's love songs 
a sad soliloquy of a survivor – always strong never loved
poignant my friend
thank you, Moonie! ♥ this was my first attempt at a “bop” so that was fun, but it is a sad story. fortunately, it’s not autobiographical. {smile} i always appreciate you taking the time to visit and comment. ♥
The recurring line is very strong and has a great image. I was wondering, respectfully like, if stanzas two and three weren’t a bit similar? But only a small obversation from someone not very talented! A very enjoyable bop.
stanzas two and three are similar intentionally. the way i understand the bop, the final stanza either describes how the problem is resolved or documents the failure. in this woman’s case, she never gave love a chance because she continued to live in the past. i appreciate your critique, Pete ~ i’m learning to write and i’m sure there is a better way to convey her failure. it’s funny how sometimes a poem i love gets no comments and one i almost threw away is liked by others, so i have developed this bad habit of posting almost everything i write. i hope you’ll visit again and always do me the honor of voicing your opinion. thank you!
Sad and haunting refrain with “a heart full of dead flowers and dead memories”
Happy sunday ~
i love your “dark” take on flowers! ♥ thank you for visiting and commenting. happy Sunday to you as well.
Glad to know it’s not autobiography–I wanted to give her a good hard shake. Been there, woke up.
The form works really well for this. Been meaning to try it since Robert’s post.
only my imagination, thank goodness! thank you so much for your visit and comment. ♥
ugh – those that survive inherit all the pain…heart-wrenching write dani
thank you for taking the time to visit and comment, Claudia! ♥ it can be difficult to let go of the pain and move forward.
Thanks Dani for sharing such heart felt poem.
thank you, Sean! ♥
so pleased its not autobiographical ! very moving sad and poignant …..thank you for sharing
thank you so much for your visit and kind comment! they’re much appreciated. ♥
I love the refrain on your bop! I just recently discovered the bop poetry form myself and though it can be difficult to write (at least for me!), it is very powerful. Nicely done!
thank you! it took some playing around with it for me to write a bop. i can’t say it’s my favorite form, but i like to try new-to-me forms. thank you for your visit and kind comment! ♥
It’s a struggle to overcome those things. It takes a lifetime. Yet it makes you stronger, more resilient, more courageous! Well written.
thank you, Gay! i really appreciate your kind comment. ♥
sad, heartwrenching :(
enjoy your poetry slam and happy poltuck
http://lynnaima.wordpress.com/2011/06/29/everlasting-tempo/
thank you, lynnaima! ♥ i appreciate your visit and comment. love your poetry. have a great week
Pierced my heart. Such sadness wrapped in such a beautiful write.
thank you, thingy! ♥ i really appreciate your visit and kind comment.
You took us from one dark age to the next to the next ~ powerful and gut-wrenching!
thank you so very much, Helen! ♥ that’s very kind of you to say. i appreciate your visit.
Oh, boy, talk about dark! I got the shivers. It’s a pleasure to explore how bad it could get …
thank you so much for your visit and kind comment. ♥
what a sad tale.
well told.
thank you, Jingle! ♥ ♥ ♥
Lovely but, very sad too.
i really appreciate your visit and kind comment. ♥
Very dark – I love the linking refrain
thank you, Jo! ♥ i’m happy you like it and really appreciate your visit and comment.
This poem is filled with such sorrow and longing, masterfully done
thank you so much for your visit and the kindness of your comment! ♥
This is a lovely dark and sad poem. “a heart filled with dead flowers and memories. Just wonderful images and love your use of repetition.
Melanie
thank you so much, Melanie! ♥ i really appreciate your visit and such a kind comment.